Dr. Clue

• The Villain
• The Hero
• The Victim

My wife and I had a fight yesterday morning -- one of those domestic spats that every couple has now and again.  It went something like this: 


Jen:  When you slid the extra leaf back into the dining room table, did you clean it first? 

Dave:  Yes, I did.  I ran a sponge across it.

Jen: But look, there's frosting on it from the cake I made on Saturday. 

Dave: Yeah, well, I didn't see that.  When I wiped it off, it looked clean. 

Jen:  But there's frosting all over it.  There...and there...and there.  If we want this table to last
for a long time, we have to keep it in good condition.

Dave:  Listen, I told you, when I wiped it, it looked clean.  I only closed up the table in the first place because it was too big for the two of us to sit at for breakfast, and I wanted us to have an nice, intimate meal.

Jen:  Okay, but you're not hearing me.  If you're going to clean it, clean it right.

Etc.


What was going on here, and how might it be relevant not only to personal relationships but also to interactions in the workplace? 

Clearly, Jen was trying to give me feedback that would help us, as a couple, maintain our furniture (and hence save money).  On the flipside, I was feeling under-appreciated; Jen didn't seem to be acknowledging my efforts (albeit unsuccessful) to do my share of the housework and to create a convivial environment.   How could we have navigated this conversation more skillfully?

During our after-fight/make-up talk, we discovered some helpful new information about ourselves.  For example, I don't need a half-dozen "thank you's" when I do something.  What I require is an acknowledgement that I tried, that I made the effort.  In other words, what I was looking for was recognition that I had a positive intention.  And I'm sure I'm not alone on this.  Whether at home or at work, people want others to know that they've tried, with the best of intentions. Once their intentions have been acknowledged, they're generally willing to hear about the impact of their performance.   If Jen and I could roll back the clock, our conversation might have gone like this:

Jen:  I appreciate your intention of cleaning and stowing away the extra leaf of the table.

Dave:  Thanks Hon.  Just trying to help out.

Jen:  It was really kind of you. And do you mind if I give a little feedback about the job you did?

Dave:  Sure--shoot away.

Jen:  Well, there's still some frosting on the table.  The impact of that is the table might be damaged and we'll have to replace it sooner rather than later.

Dave:  Wow, I really did try to clean it.

Jen:  And again, I appreciate your intention. It was super sweet.  And in the future, if you can bring just a little more attention to detail, everyone wins.


Feedback is important!  If someone doesn't speak up in the workplace, then procedures will never be improved, products will never reach their highest levels of quality.  My general recommendation regaring giving feedback is simply this: 

FIRST acknowledge people's positive intentions, THEN outline the impact, THEN suggest steps for improvement:

"Challenge Courses (or ropes courses) are a progression of low team-based elements and high challenge elements built in the trees using cables, ladders and ropes. These “elements” use physical, emotional and mental challenges that employ both human and rope safety systems to encourage team development, support, trust, leadership and personal goal-setting."

The clientele -- at least at PLI -- is mostly middle- and senior- high school students, many of whom are described as "at risk".  It's a great program and I'm enjoying the training process.  The one thing that rankles me a bit, though, is the overall emphasis on "fun" rather than "learning".  My fellow trainers are absolutely fantastic about pumping up the energy and inspiring the kids to "go for it".  And perhaps, for teens, this is an important lesson:  if you bring the energy, you can do a lot more than you think you can do. 

Still, I can't help thinking that there's some wasted potential here.  I keep hearing that teens have short attention spans; they can't do long debriefs.  I wonder about that.  From my experience, kids are smarter and more savvy than we think.  They *can* sit and think about things. They *can* process an experience and relate it back to their lives, which is what debriefs are all about.  And they *can* conceive of next steps for implementing learning.  

Whether the team building is a ropes course, a treasure hunt, or a more formal workplace training, I think we need to check in with ourselves and ask, "Are we selling our clients short?"  The temptation is to simply emphasize the fun and leave people with that--a heart-pumping, high-energy experience.  Not that there's anything wrong with that. But without thorough debriefs, so much potential student learning is wasted.  No matter the age group, I think our clients can handle a little discussion, a little processing...and deep down, I think they really do want it. 

Hey everyone.  I'm doing my first teleclass this Wednesday.  Here's the blurb:

"Creating Team-Building Treasure Hunts: The Five Deadly Mistakes (and how to avoid them)"

WHEN:
2:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m. Eastern
1:00 to 2:00 p.m. Central
12:00 to 1:00 p.m. Mountain
11:00 to 12:00 a.m. Pacific

PRICE: 
Free

»REGISTER NOW: Email us at drclue@drclue.com for call-in details.

Admit it—you loved scavenger hunts and treasure hunts when you were a kid. We all did. Creating a team building treasure hunt for your organization (office, department, networking/social group) sounds like a GREAT idea—fun, interactive, and low-cost. The questions is, with all the option out there, how do you pull it off? How should the hunt be structured? What should the clues look like? And how can you tie it all back to business issues while still making it fun? When it comes to team building these days, you only have so much time and budget—your reputation is on the line. You have to make EACH EVENT COUNT.

In this audio conference, we’ll teach you all the nuts and bolts for creating your own fantastic, do-it-yourself treasure hunt.

Learning Objectives:

• Choosing the right treasure hunt format
• Managing the logistics
• Scouting locations
• Choosing the proper “clue validation system”
• Making the hunt relevant

HOW TO REGISTER:

• Register now by emailing us at drclue@drclue.com
• CALL toll-free 800-431-7571

Speaker: Dave Blum, President & Founder, Dr. Clue Treasure Hunts

Founded in 1995, Dr. Clue is the brainchild of San Francisco-native Dave Blum. Dave holds a B.A. in English from Pomona College in Claremont, California, is a member of ASTD, a recent board member of the North American Simulation & Gaming Association (http://www.nasaga.org/), and is the founder and CEO of Dr. Clue (http://www.drclue.com). After a three-year stint teaching English in Japan, Dave worked in tourism and the non-profit sector before discovering his destiny as a treasure hunt master, team-building trainer, and entrepreneur. From his initial treasure hunt experiments in San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park, Dave has built his passion for puzzles, wordplay and team development into an international business with over 100 hunt locations worldwide. In its first thirteen years, Dr. Clue has performed over 500 teambuilding treasure hunts around the world, for such clients as Coca Cola, IBM, Bank of America, Cisco Systems, Genentech, ExxonMobil, and many others. Dr. Clue is the world’s largest team building company that specializes in clue-based, business-focused treasure hunts. Dave blogs regularly at blog.drclue.com

On Friday in this blog, I was discussing last Wednesday's Dr. Clue treasure hunt in South Beach, Miami for Wiginton Corporation.  The particular topic on my mind was: "Should Managers Take Part in Your Teambuilding Program?"  I continue to find this a very relevant question.  When managers (and team leaders) participate in a teambuilding program, the folks below them in the hierarchy most certainly behave differently.  This can be both a good thing and a bad thing, depending on 1) What you want participants to take away and 2) What you want to learn about people through observation.  In the case of last Wednesday's office team building activity in Miami, it was clear that the players looked to the company owner, Alan, for guidance.  When he declined to provide direction, the team clearly experienced a leadership gap.   Although in retrospect Alan felt a little bad about his team's poor performance, I think that he and his leadership staff learned some valuable lessons from the experience.  So that's a learning point for all of us trainers and team building consultants to remember:  when a program goes wrong, you can often harvest it for meaning and turn failure to success!  

On Friday, I ran the second round of scavenger hunts for Wiginton, this time in downtown Orlando.   Alan and his co-organizer, Steve Browne, opted this time to sit out the hunt, allowing the participants of the office team building game to play the the activity themselves, without management interference.  Everyone did great...and perhaps most importantly, Alan and Steve could concentrate on observing other people's leadership potential. 

Click on the image below to to hear what Steve Browne (Human Resource Director at Wiginton Corporation) had to say about the outcomes of his business team building exercise:

Following my solemn guide deeper and deeper into Tofukuji's sanctum sanctorum, I remember thinking to myself:  "This is incredible!  I made it! And in a few minutes, I'm going to meet an actual enlightened person!" 

Would my life be changed, as Tim suggested?  Was I about to experience a peak experience?  I was both nervous and excited to find out.

Eventually I was led into a traditional Japanese room, with large windows and tatami flooring.  At one end of the office was a large desk -- at the other, a plush leather couch.  On the walls were pictures of the Roshi with what I assumed were photos of his friends and admirers, including Prince Charles of England, of all people.  Thirty minutes of quiet waiting later, the Roshi, himself, came in at last . Readying myself for a deep, traditional bow, I jumped to my feet and quickly tried to compose myself for a formal greeting.  The Roshi--a small, round man with bald head and twinkling eyes, beat me to the punch, quickly thrusting out his arm and grabbing my hand in a vigorous shake.   "Nice to meet you. Thank you for visiting my temple!" he declared, in perfect English.

Rather than coming across as frighteningly deep and serene, Fukushima Roshi struck me as congenial...jolly even. When he spoke, his whole being seemed suffused with humor.  Merry to the extreme, without forcing it, the Roshi positively giggled when he spoke.  As we talked, I learned  more about his life -- his tour of the U.S., his long-standing friendship with Prince Charles and other world leaders, his relationship with my college.  (As it turns out, from 1973 to 1974, he taught Zen Meditation to American stuedents at Claremont College.)  We spoke about my friend, Tim, and his professor, Margaret Dornish.  In the end, the Roshi asked where I was staying in Kyoto and inquired how I was getting back to my hotel.  Before I knew it, a yellow cab had arrived in the temple compound, waiting to take me back.  

"It was nice to meet you, David-san.  Here are some postcards of Tofukuji.  I've paid for your taxi.  Have a safe trip back, and please come again."   The audience was over; I was off. 

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So much suffering in life (and work) is about our expectations.  You go into a situation expecting something:  happiness, perhaps, or safety, security, excitement, a peak experience.  So often, instead, what you get is a simple interaction with a plain-speaking man...and if you're lucky, a nice pack of postcards to take home with you.  The trick, it seems -- whatever the situation -- is to put aside your disappointment, your expectations -- and to look for whatever nuggets there might be to harvest from the experience.   Did the Abbot of Tofukuji temple change my life?  Not particularly.  I enjoyed speaking with him, but didn't feel especially "touched by divinity" afterwards.  I will always remember his dancing eyes, however. 

I'm intrigued by this Web 2.0 thing, even if I don't exactly know how to make money from it.  Is anyone out there really using Social Networking to make a profit (apart from the so-called Twitter/LinkedIn/Facebook "consultants")?   

Especially from a team building facilitator's perspective, one thing I DO like about LinkedIn, for example, is the "recommendation" function.  In a nutshell, you can ask for people to recommend you as a service provider -- which is great -- but even better, as soon as you post someone's recomendation of you, the site suggests you return the favor and praise that person back.  Has this lead to increased business for me?  I have no idea.  It certainly hasn't hurt to have personal, online "testimonials" posted on the web.  What I've valued most about it, though, is the opportunity to exchange kudos with my colleagues.  

In teams, trust is built a number of different ways--and expressing mutual appreciation is a big one.  Surprisingly, though, whether it's in the workplace or out on corporate team building outings, appreciation is rarely vocalized.  Strange but true!

So--if you're on LinkedIn, here's your chance to give the appreciation people are starving for.  Think about someone you haven't heard from for awhile and write them a recommendation.  Do it out of the blue.  Be honest and specific in your praise.  I think you'll be surprised by the love that comes back to you, and how strengthened your relationship becomes in the process.